Hundreds came together for ‘Big Conversation’ about living and dying well

School pupils, university students, GPs, nurses, hospital staff, hospice patients, families and members of the public joined together for a week of activities to open up conversations about living and dying.

Led by Pilgrims Hospices, the East Kent campaign took place to coincide with a UK-wide conversation for the national Dying Matters Awareness Week from 9-13 May.

Cate Russell, Pilgrims Hospices Chief Executive, explained: “Part of the hospice’s vision is to raise awareness of the help that’s out there so we can support and empower people with a terminal illness, their family and friends to live well in every moment and die ‘well’. To do this means challenging the taboos around talking about death so that people across our diverse community can have the conversations they need to access the right support at the right time.”

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Students and teachers from the King’s School Canterbury came to visit the hospice. One student said: “It has such a lovely atmosphere”.

Throughout the week, hundreds of people visited Twitter, Facebook and the Pilgrims Hospices website to read blogs shared by service users and professionals.

Tony Weller, a 61-year-old farmer from Woodchurch, was among those who contributed an article. He recently accessed the Pilgrims pain management programme and wants other people in his position to know what’s on offer on their doorstep.

“I think there’s a dreadful misconception of hospices as a frightening, miserable places but now I have experienced it for myself I will have absolutely no hesitation in coming back if I need further support. If I meet other people in my position I will make sure I tell them that help is at hand.”

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Tony Weller, a 61-year-old farmer from Woodchurch, was among those who contributed an article.

Pilgrims specialist nurse Maria Marley said having these ‘big conversations’ and making your preferences known is a good way to make sure that anyone who provides care for you, now or in the future, tailors that care to your wishes.

“Once families talk about their wishes people can feel a huge sense of relief. Of course, you don’t need to have a terminal diagnosis to express your wishes. I have started having these conversations with my own family at home. I find it comforting knowing my wishes will be fulfilled. Whether people come to Pilgrims for support or prefer to talk to their GP, the key is to give people the tools and the confidence to be more open.”

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Online hundreds of people visited Twitter, Facebook and the Pilgrims Hospices website to read blogs shared by service users and professionals including hospice nurse Maria on talking about your wishes; 22 year old Holly on support for families; musician Shelagh and farmer Tony about how hospice life has supported them to live well and from ex-nurse Simon who is now a service user and has changed his view of what ‘hospice’ means. 

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Twenty two year old Holly shares her experiences of hospice support for families and having the Big Conversation to access the right care.

Local papers across the region, including Kentish Gazette, Kentish Express and the Isle of Thanet Gazette ran articles to promote the debate which was supported by teams from William Harvey Hospital, Queen Elizabeth Queen Mother Hospital, Kent and Canterbury and clinical commissioning groups across the county who used the hashtag #BigConversationEKent to encourage people to share thoughts and experiences on living and dying well. They held local events and shared their own stories online too, such as this news item reporting a new scheme in South Kent for end of life patients cared for at home.

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Mary Kirk, from Kent Community Health NHS Foundation Trust, held events in Deal and Dover to encourage the Big Conversation during Dying Matters week.

A group of GPs and consultants also joined the Big Conversation, taking part in an interactive training session with Pilgrims Hospices’ Medical Director, Andrew Thorns, looking at how best to initiate those difficult conversations about death and dying.

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Pilgrims Medical Director led a workshop for GPs on communicating with end of life patients.

Students and teachers from the King’s School Canterbury also took part, coming in for a tour of the hospice to hear about the wide range of services offered. They shares their thoughts afterwards saying: “I didn’t realise it would be so friendly”; “It had such a lovely atmosphere”; “I was amazed by the equipment they had so that you could carry on doing normal things” and “I didn’t want to cry at all, it was such a nice place.”

Cate Russell, Pilgrims Hospices’ Chief Executive, said: “We are really pleased to see how many people have been involved this week from across the Kent community. Pilgrims vision for the hospice is that we want to empower people to live well in each moment and to support people at end of life so they and their families can make informed choices. Raising awareness of the services and support that is available in east Kent is a vital part of achieving this so we hope that for each person who took part in this campaign there will be many ripples out into the community that will change thinking around what people should expect at the end of life.”

Thank you to everyone who joined in with the #BigConversationeKent. To find out about upcoming campaigns and read more of our news and blogs look out on our website, Facebook page and Twitter feed.

If you or a member of your family is coping with a terminal illness and you want to find out whether Pilgrims services are appropriate for them please talk to your GP initially or click here to find out more. 

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